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Cum pot sa scap de „placerea” de masturbare ? Stiu ca este poate o prostie sa intreb dar totusi am o problema in acest sens deoarece nu pot sa comunic deschis cu o femeie, darmite sa mai o fac si prietena mea.

Intrebare pusa de: Tr., 42

Raspunsul psihologului:

Daca inteleg eu bine, tu crezi ca placerea de a te masturba a devenit in cazul tau o “fixatie”, un obstacol care te impiedica sa legi o relatie cu o femeie. Si gandesti implicit ca daca ai renunta la acest obicei, ti-ar fi mai usor sa comunici cu femeile.

Viziunea mea este diferita si am sa dau un exemplu ajutator pentru a ma face mai bine inteles. Sa ne imaginam un barbat sarac care se lupta cu foamea. Trece prin fata vitrinei unui restaurant, vede inauntru oameni mancand, saliveaza, i se strange si mai mult stomacul, dar nu poate intra caci nu are bani. Nu isi poate permite nici macar sa intre la un fast-food. Dar vede la un moment dat o covrigarie, isi cumpara 2 covrigi si isi potoleste intrucatva foamea. Ei bine, ar fi ciudat sa gandim ca omul acesta nu a intrat la restaurant din cauza ca a cumparat 2 covrigi, nu-i asa? Nu a mancat la restaurant nu din cauza covrigilor, ci din pricina ca nu avea bani. Iar a-i interzice unui om flamand si sarac pana si dreptul la 2 covrigi… ar fi cam mult, nu crezi?

La fel si in cazul tau: tu nu ai probleme cu femeile din cauza ca te masturbezi, ci pentru ca esti sarac in ceea ce priveste abilitatile de a lua contact cu emotiile tale, de a reflecta asupra lor si de a comunica.

Pulsiunea sexuala este o trebuinta bazala (ca si foamea), ea are nevoie sa fie satisfacuta intr-un fel, iar a-ti interzice masturbarea, in conditiile in care nu ai devenit inca bogat in abilitatile mentionate mai sus, nu ar conduce decat la nervozitate, iritabilitate, stari de angoasa alternate cu stari de furie, iar pe termen lung la idei bizare.

See Also

Prin urmare, ti-am sugerat deja solutia: trebuie sa iti dezvolti abilitatile de a lua contact cu emotiile tale, de a le verbaliza, de a reflecta asupra lor pentru a le putea canaliza constructiv, pentru a pune energia lor sa lucreze in folosul tau. Si exista suficienti psihoterapeuti in Romania care sa te poata ajuta in acest proces. Mult succes!

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